Understanding You

I was thinking about the order of which articles should be written, whether I should be churning out articles on certain topics then move on to other relevant topics. In the interest of maintaining my motivation to keep on doing this, I decided NOT to over analyze the methodology and go with the flow!

It's the second week of Ramadhan and I am away from home again for work. Missed my daughter's third birthday which was on August 8th, however, we did a pre-celebration the night before I left. Here's Iryna and her birthday "cake" (a medley of cupcakes really).

In 2 days, August 11th, it would have been my late father-in-law's birthday (my thoughts and prayers are with him). My father-in-law was quite an intricate man; at times, you would think that you have had him figured out, and then you quickly find out that you've had more to learn. Seemed hard-shelled and stubborn on the exterior but definitely soft and delicate on the inside. He was hugely passionate about politics and would go on for hours at the dinner table on policies he did not agree with or selection of leaders he thought reflected the poor taste of our party's leadership (I was visibly agreeable with him for the most part by nodding or adding reinforcing statements, being the good son-in-law, and was quiet on the parts I did not agree with him out of respect including the fact that I was living in his house for a few years!). It takes a certain personality to manage my father-in-law and gain his trust.

How do you know your own personality and work on the areas needing improvement? Sounds a bit straight forward but if you jot it down on paper, it's nothing but. A few months ago, I was asked to take a personality test to evaluate my personality. Organized by Insights, a company head-quartered in the UK, the personality test started with a series of multiple choice questions on your response or reaction to certain scenarios. Initially I thought it was quite elementary and thought that I got it figured out - typical "Red" personality (I will explain briefly what Red means)! A few weeks later, we were mailed a thick report based on the questions you answered.

The report had numerous topics, including my "profile", suggestions on how to deal with people like me, how other "profiles" should interact with me, the do's and dont's with me - the report was really a thorough analysis on how I view the world and how the "world" views me. There were four colors to group people's different characteristics: Red signifies the typical manager who wants everything done his way, listens little and is results oriented. Blue signifies a technical person who gets into details and is very organized, despises others lacking process, standards, strategy, or organization skills. Yellow signifies a happy go lucky person, trouble-free and highly sociable. Green is the type that likes to bond and build relationship, highly collaborative, wants to move as one team. I was flagged as 50% red 50%blue, a "reforming director" with a "green" subconscious. In short, reforming directors are typically self-motivated, organized, strategic but lacks empathy and does not spend time to "reward" and "recognize" people.

As I read the 30-page report, my initial thought was this is a template that they send out to typical red/blue individuals. Thinking of outsmarting the system, I asked several of my colleagues in the program and read the reports which had a red/blue designation. To my surprise, they're all written differently and highly customized to the individual. I quietly returned to my room and finished reading the report.

There were a few statements that stood out - I was impatient with people I perceive as having lower standards (sadly true!), I tend to avoid social bubbly people (so true which explains why I hate cocktails and black tie events), I typically fail to say enough "thank you" and appreciate people's work (there was a whole section of weaknesses!).

How did this help me? "Yellows" tend to be people with extrovert characteristics; they want to have fun all the time, very present time-oriented and do not want to worry about the future, highly disorganized, bubbly, always optimistic, you get the picture. "Blues" are the natural opposites. The program teaches you how to strategically approach your opposites and work on the skills you need to build a cohesive team; including "yellow" team members! Over time, I learned the hard way that 1) I am not right all the time 2) spending a few minutes a week to appreciate someone else's hard work pays off dividend in the future 3) a leader is not a leader until he has followers!

Using the report as a guideline, my leader and I built a personal development plan which included not just the typical career-related aspirations and training requirements, but the things I'm working on to be a better leader. We also built a 90-day plan to "test" one or two principles and evaluate after 90 days.

I must say that I now carefully plan how I approach certain subjects in my communication, whether it's a quick email or a lengthy meeting with edgy and anxious staff. Your personality affects how quickly you build allies to support tough decisions or get ignored for coming up with ridiculous ideas. I still have a long way to go to master this.